(July 11, 2018) 10:16 PM This evening Sheba and I were sitting on the front porch watching the storms going through the area, casting a feeling of foreboding over the countryside. My mind went to a decision I recently made that I have since come to regret. It wasn’t a life or death matter, or even a right versus wrong matter. It was simply a choice I made, made too hastily and without sufficient forethought. The regrets have since piled up in my brain and are sitting there festering. Ugh. I’m often paralyzed by decision making. I have been guilty of making by-the-seat-of-my-pants decisions. Then I say to myself, “Wie dumm von mir!” (Okay, so I don’t really speak German to myself. Well, not often. But I love that line of Rommel’s from the movie The Longest Day. “How dumb of me!” said the German commander when he realized that the Allied invasion of Europe was taking place in Normandy and not at the Pas de Calais as everyone, Rommel included, had assumed.) Do you know what happened next? I opened the book of Hebrews and my eyes just happened to fall on Heb. 4:14-16. That was a God thing, big time. This text began whispering to me, “You’re ignoring your Great High Priest.” And I was. Not only was I not turning to the throne of grace for help in time of need, I was turning everywhere else for relief from my self-inflicted guilt. Evidently, Jesus understands exactly what I’m going through. “Our High Priest is not one who cannot feel sympathy for our weaknesses.” And boy do I have weaknesses. Becky would have not made the mistake I made. But I’m not Becky. I’m me. We each had our own weaknesses, but a good many of them we shared, per Craig Koester’s description of “weaknesses” in his Hebrews commentary (p. 283):
1) Physical weakness.
2) Social weakness.
3) Vulnerability to sin.
Jesus enables weak people like me to “approach the throne of grace” (v. 14). “[H]uman beings are subject to forces beyond their control, and they need help to cope with daily life” (Koester, p. 295). There is something so nourishing, so healing, when we remember that our High Priest understands exactly what we’re going through. It’s like falling into a soft cushion. When I’m feeling down, I want to call Pizza Hut. When I fail to look unto Jesus, the Pioneer and Perfecter of faith, I injure my own soul. A soul divided against itself will collapse, crushing everyone taking refuge under its shelter. Enter Jesus. Is there anything more we could ask for? Sure, we could spend our lives dragging our regrets behind us, but that’s our choice. Jesus allows us to move beyond our guilt and regrets by commanding us to look unto Himself (Heb. 12:2). “You’re not a failure.” “Everyone else struggles like you.” “I understand.” Jesus may have suffered, but I bet you a thousand bucks He was not whiny. I am His friend, beloved and treasured. If I ask Him for strength and mercy and grace, He will give them to me.
Obviously, I’m still working on this wisdom thingy. When we make silly decisions, He’s neither shocked nor horrified. Love still wins. Hope still triumphs. Faith still conquers. I may not be able to see my Great High Priest, but evidences of His presence are everywhere. All I have to do is pause and look for them. If any of you cared what I thought and asked for my opinion (right after Uncle Sam sends me a million dollar tax refund), I would say that we all need to give a lot more space in our lives for the concept of redemption. We need to incorporate a worldview that begins and ends with our Great High Priest, Jesus. I couldn’t fathom living a single day without Him. Could you? This has everything to do with Christian discipleship. Not only is Jesus the compassionate High Priest we’ve always wanted, He creates peace in us that we can only find in Him.
I’ve had many setbacks in life. And there will be plenty more to come. But the fact is, failure after failure has brought me to the place where I am today. The point is that I tried. I wasn’t afraid of failing. Mistakes are always learning opportunities.
Learn from your mistakes.
Never let fear paralyze you.
Fall down 10 times, get up 11.
Keep the faith even when you have no earthly reason to do so.
Never be the victim of your circumstances.
Stop beating yourself up.
Grab hold of your High Priest.
In celebration of Him, I’m gonna visit the throne of grace and tarry a while tonight. It’s not about me. It’s about Jesus — not Jesus the tooth fairy, but Jesus the Redeemer and Lover of my soul. This is so cliché, I know, but it really is true.
Through all of my tough times, I will forever be grateful for Him.
(From Dave Black Online. Used by permission.)